Yeah this was solid. The movement and pacing kept me wanting to scroll faster and faster to get the next email. And then that ending...hits hard. Could be a story from a sad memoir. Wonderfully done and thanks for sharing!
I love this so much. so absurd how these horrible things happen and ripple through people - how they have a butterfly effect on our neighbors, our friends... The ending reminds me of how time never stops you know? How the crazy neighbor is in his apartment, living that day over and over, and meanwhile outside bad things still happen. And we process all of it by talking to each other. the conversational format only makes it MORE human on top of that. Bravo bravo bravo.
Damn, I never thought about the idea of timing being stopped for the dude in 3110. I see it so clearly now. Thanks for pointing that out and for the very kind words :)
Will, I loved lemons. You were so clever to have several plains of action going simultaneously with the creepy 9/11 guy taking center stage. I could see this developed into a full scale movie with a little more development of this miserable guy and his 9/11 fetish. So well developed and written. One of your best.
I don’t liked to swear in comments (for some reason)... but fuck Will! This had me on the edge of my seat. I had know idea where you was going with it, but I was soooo intrigued. And the way you had this one story going about the 9-11 guy and then ended it with this other story that seemed sort of in the background was brilliant. As was the tone, like having it in text form.
Bravo sir. One of the best short stories I’ve read in a while :)
wow!! Thanks so much, Michael! This one was new territory for me and i wasn't sure how it would play off for the reader so your feedback means so much!
I enjoyed how this unfolded, the obsession we have with ourselves and the probably not very important things that are literally next door to us. Meanwhile, in the real world, people who are close to us are suffering, die, while we watch the 'news' on the TV.
Really enjoyed this, Will. I think it could stand on its own as a new series. It’s human, intriguing, and rhythmically intense. Perhaps a new series titled ‘Sent from My iPhone’?
I think this format of yours, with dialogue shown from only one side (where the other side's responses can only be inferred or imagined), is brilliant and where the real value lies. I would vary the characters (and, of course, the stories). I really loved it!
hmmm I like that. It was a lot of fun to write and a bit of an homage to David Foster Wallace’s Brief Interviews with Hideous Men. I’d love to explore the form a bit more.
I think you should! Not only are you a gifted writer, both in terms of style and prose, but you're also highly imaginative, in my opinion. This makes for the perfect combination for a series like that. Enough of my ranting though; all this is to say I'd love to see more of it. :)
A very enjoyable read. And that ending...masterful use of the short story format to twist the digger right there in such an unexpected way. And the leave us with a zillion questions. And not to answer them. And that's the whole point.
As a writer I also took note and loved how you used the Substack formatting options here. An innovative use of code block to great effect.
Definitely. I first saw it used in Dracula Daily and it have me an idea for how I want to use it in my own upcoming novel which I'm serializing here on Substack too.
FYI: I came to your piece today from the "Top in Fiction" Stack :)
I just have to say WOW! This is quite masterful, Will. The obsession with another person's obsession from the perspective of the initially unwilling voyeur trying to figure it out, to a shocking reveal the writer doesn't expect at all. To the ending. Very impressed with this one. (I just wrote a piece in letters - seems to be a thing we are vibing on this week).
I want to read the piece you wrote in letters! It was the first time I did anything like this and I found it to be really fun and (I think) effective in how it personalizes the weird plot. Thanks so much for the kind words :)
Yeah this was solid. The movement and pacing kept me wanting to scroll faster and faster to get the next email. And then that ending...hits hard. Could be a story from a sad memoir. Wonderfully done and thanks for sharing!
thanks, Bryan!
I love this so much. so absurd how these horrible things happen and ripple through people - how they have a butterfly effect on our neighbors, our friends... The ending reminds me of how time never stops you know? How the crazy neighbor is in his apartment, living that day over and over, and meanwhile outside bad things still happen. And we process all of it by talking to each other. the conversational format only makes it MORE human on top of that. Bravo bravo bravo.
Damn, I never thought about the idea of timing being stopped for the dude in 3110. I see it so clearly now. Thanks for pointing that out and for the very kind words :)
Will, I loved lemons. You were so clever to have several plains of action going simultaneously with the creepy 9/11 guy taking center stage. I could see this developed into a full scale movie with a little more development of this miserable guy and his 9/11 fetish. So well developed and written. One of your best.
Thanks so much, Sandy! Always love hearing from you my friend
I don’t liked to swear in comments (for some reason)... but fuck Will! This had me on the edge of my seat. I had know idea where you was going with it, but I was soooo intrigued. And the way you had this one story going about the 9-11 guy and then ended it with this other story that seemed sort of in the background was brilliant. As was the tone, like having it in text form.
Bravo sir. One of the best short stories I’ve read in a while :)
wow!! Thanks so much, Michael! This one was new territory for me and i wasn't sure how it would play off for the reader so your feedback means so much!
My pleasure, Will.
I really liked it. :)
the format of one-sided emails is heartbreaking enough. will, what the hell.
Really? I’ve never tried it before, figured I’d give it a go…thanks so much for the feedback, means a lot :)
Finally got to read this and so glad I did, Will! I really enjoyed the pacing and structure with this one. Very unique stuff.
Thanks Logan!!!
I enjoyed how this unfolded, the obsession we have with ourselves and the probably not very important things that are literally next door to us. Meanwhile, in the real world, people who are close to us are suffering, die, while we watch the 'news' on the TV.
Thanks, Jane! Indeed, we are entrenched in our own little universes we wish to be awe-inspiring but are likely mundane.
We like to think the universe revolves around our little selves.
Really enjoyed this, Will. I think it could stand on its own as a new series. It’s human, intriguing, and rhythmically intense. Perhaps a new series titled ‘Sent from My iPhone’?
Thank so much Silvio! That's an interesting idea! You mean keep the characters in this one or use the series as a vehicle for the format?
I think this format of yours, with dialogue shown from only one side (where the other side's responses can only be inferred or imagined), is brilliant and where the real value lies. I would vary the characters (and, of course, the stories). I really loved it!
hmmm I like that. It was a lot of fun to write and a bit of an homage to David Foster Wallace’s Brief Interviews with Hideous Men. I’d love to explore the form a bit more.
I think you should! Not only are you a gifted writer, both in terms of style and prose, but you're also highly imaginative, in my opinion. This makes for the perfect combination for a series like that. Enough of my ranting though; all this is to say I'd love to see more of it. :)
Riveting and true to life. Well done!
Thank you rena 🙏🙏
This is really fantastic! It's so innovative. And telling one side of the story like this, through the emails, works incredibly well... 😎
Thanks so much Chris!
This was very inventive and absurd and dreadful in all the best ways. Made me pucker a bit.
I’m glad it was a tad sour
Like another commenter said, very riveting. I don't think I've ever read something in this format before! Certainly not this grabbing. I love it!
Thank you, Valletta!! I’m glad the format didn’t take away from the story…I was worried it could come of as a gimmick.
Incredible stuff! What a brilliant way to experiment with form. And the odd poetic bits that burst through the rambl-y messages; haunting. Loved it.
Thanks so much Anagha!
A very enjoyable read. And that ending...masterful use of the short story format to twist the digger right there in such an unexpected way. And the leave us with a zillion questions. And not to answer them. And that's the whole point.
As a writer I also took note and loved how you used the Substack formatting options here. An innovative use of code block to great effect.
Thanks so much, Sue! I’ve always wanted to use the code block feature haha I’m glad it added something to the piece
Definitely. I first saw it used in Dracula Daily and it have me an idea for how I want to use it in my own upcoming novel which I'm serializing here on Substack too.
FYI: I came to your piece today from the "Top in Fiction" Stack :)
I just have to say WOW! This is quite masterful, Will. The obsession with another person's obsession from the perspective of the initially unwilling voyeur trying to figure it out, to a shocking reveal the writer doesn't expect at all. To the ending. Very impressed with this one. (I just wrote a piece in letters - seems to be a thing we are vibing on this week).
I want to read the piece you wrote in letters! It was the first time I did anything like this and I found it to be really fun and (I think) effective in how it personalizes the weird plot. Thanks so much for the kind words :)
"you okay??? I tried calling like three times...
Sent from my iPhone
???
Sent from my iPhone"
...brilliant
Thanks, Anna!